Funny cocktail napkins are the easiest way to give a party a sense of humor without anyone having to make a toast. Pick a saying that fits the night (game night, wine night, a holiday), put a stack next to the drinks, and let the napkin start the conversation. Ours come 16 to a set for $18 and look like linen.
We started making cocktail napkins because every party we threw had the same moment: someone picks up a napkin, reads it, laughs, and shows the person next to them!!
That is the whole job of a cocktail napkin, really. It is the first thing guests touch, it sits right next to the drinks, and it gets passed around. So it might as well say something.
Here are the ones we make, sorted by the kind of night you are having. All of the disposable sets are made from an air-laid paper that looks and feels like linen, 16 napkins to a set, $18. The linen sets are embroidered, four to a set, $40.
For mahjong and game night
Let's Mahj. The invitation and the napkin in one.
MAHJ MAHJ MAHJ. For the table that plays every week and would like you to know it.
Dot Bam Crack. The three suits, for players only. Everyone else will ask, which is half the fun.
Jokers Welcome. For the friend who always seems to be holding all of them.
Pause... Nevermind. Every mahj player has said it. Most of them said it last week.
Hosting the game? The Mahjong Hostess Bundle puts napkins and wine charms together, so the table looks planned before the tiles come out.
For wine night and cocktail hour
Rosé All Day. A schedule, not a suggestion.
Wine Snob. For the friend who swirls. Or for you, if you swirl.
Champagne Problems. The best kind of problems, and the napkin that goes with every bottle of bubbles.
Overserved. For the guest who arrived early and is still here. Every party has one.
Martini linen cocktail napkins. The embroidered version, $40 for four, for a bar cart that takes itself a little more seriously.
For dinner parties and a little gossip
You Didn't Hear It From Me. Put these out and watch who reads them a little too closely.
No Politics Please. House rules, printed where everyone can see them. Especially useful at family dinners.
Southern Gossip linen cocktail napkins. Embroidered, four to a set, and best served with something sweet and a long porch story.
For Thanksgiving and the holidays
Thank Full. Cream with gold foil, for the cocktail hour while the turkey rests. A good pun for a full table.
Merry. One word, no notes. Right for any holiday party from December 1 on.
Naughty or Nice. Let your guests decide which list they are on. Most will pick naughty.
Jew-ish linen cocktail napkins. Embroidered, four to a set, for Shabbat dinners and holiday tables with a sense of humor.
And one for the powder room: The Powder Room Has Ears disposable guest towels, $30. Every guest goes in there. Give them something to read.
How do you choose a funny cocktail napkin?
Match the joke to the room. A mahjong group will love Dot Bam Crack and a mixed crowd may not get it, which can be part of the fun, or not. For a family dinner, something gentle (Thank Full, Merry) lands better than something pointed. For a girls' night or a game night, go as cheeky as your friends are.
If you are not sure, wine and cocktail jokes are the safest bet. Everyone at a cocktail party is holding a drink.
Disposable or linen cocktail napkins?
Disposable is right for big parties, outdoor parties, and any night you do not want to think about laundry. Ours look like linen, so they do not read as paper plates.
Linen is right for smaller dinners, regular hosting, and gifts. They wash, they last, and they are the thing hosts never buy for themselves.
Plenty of hosts keep both: linen for dinner, disposables stacked by the bar.
Funny cocktail napkin FAQ
How many cocktail napkins do you need per guest?
Plan on about three per guest for a cocktail party, more if there is a lot of food. A set of 16 covers five or six guests, so two sets cover a dinner party of ten with some to spare.
Are funny cocktail napkins a good hostess gift?
Yes. They are useful, they cost less than a good bottle of wine, and the host will put them out at her next party, which means you get thought of again. Tie a set with a ribbon and it is gift ready.
Do your disposable cocktail napkins feel like paper?
They are made from air-laid paper, which has a softer, thicker, fabric-like feel than standard paper napkins. Most guests assume they are cloth until they pick one up.
Where can I buy funny cocktail napkins?
All of the napkins in this post are on our site, and many are also carried by gift and home shops around the country.
Every napkin here started as a joke one of us made at our own table. If you have a saying you wish existed, tell us. We do custom napkins too.
Shop all cocktail napkins. Shipping is free on orders over $90.
xo, Krista & Sabrina